justrun-.

bye bye 15yrold me

it's the last few hours of my life as a fifteen year old. not sure how i'm feeling. many things i regret doing in my life as a fifteen year old. such as stuffing my face repeatedly and succumbing to stress. this is not good. on my last day as a fifteen year old i am still a fat tub of lard. how depressing.

how meaningfully have i lived my life over this past year? i really wonder. maybe now's not a good time to wonder. given my high stress level. i felt so groggy in school today. my headaches are still around. "tension headaches" as daddy calls them. i think i should name my gastric pains "stresstric" or something along those lines.

didn't do double training as i wanted/ expected today. instead only went for rg training. did my first run on turf city grounds since xctry natls last year. guess what? this year's xctry natls are in 7days. haha and i just stepped on terrain TODAY. how funny. met a coupl'a people there. jigglypuff popped up from nowhere. and i still wonder if "fab" is a good name for me at all.

what i hope for next year? hope that my life as a 16 yearold will be full of joy, happiness, achievement and meaning. i don't like living a meaningless life! so easy to say, so hard to do. especially when right now, everything's a blur.

friends walk in and out of our lives so quickly. sometimes it's hard not to feel the pain of them leaving.

right i'm sad. had a family-minus-2 dinner today. cos tmr i'll be too busy to celebrate. ate a lot.

i really hope that when i turn sixteen, i'll start being more positive and having more faith. does age bring that to you? i hope it does.

[pat]* decided to runaway-.

put on her shoes at [22:32]

and took [20060405] strides

it's the passion that drives you